


amaryllis

by bokeae



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, Bottom Dan, Bottom!Dan, DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Flowers, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Hurt Phil, Language of Flowers, M/M, Phan Angst, Phan Fluff, Phan Smut, Phanfiction, Prince Dan, Prince Phil, Prince! Dan, Prince! Phil, Royalty! Phan, Sad Ending, Top Phil, medieval phan, top!phil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 09:00:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7795573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokeae/pseuds/bokeae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Amaryllis," Phil explained, showing Dan the flower. Dan spun it between his finger, staring at it in awe. "It represents pride."<br/>"Huh," Dan grinned at it, "It's my favourite yet."</p><p>In which Dan has to wed Princess Alice when he would much rather marry her brother, Philip.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <a href="https://ficbook.net/readfic/5140255">RUSSIAN TRANSLATION!</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. CARNATIONS

**Author's Note:**

> uh hi? This is my second phanfic and maybe it's shitty??? idk feedback is WELCOME. my tumblr is [@bokeae](http://bokeae.tumblr.com/) btw
> 
> AHH @/ELECTED_HELL MADE A WONDERFUL [COLLAGE](http://electedhell.tumblr.com/post/164666953249/amaryllis-phil-explained-showing-dan-the) ABOUT THIS FIC DFBHVDHVBVEFHS CHECK IT OUT PLEASE

Nerves bit at Prince Daniel, he forgot how to gulp and his breathing seemed forced, not at all natural. He had to remind himself to blink.

  
Princess Alice was glaring daggers at him and he was intimidated. Her look was icy, colder than his own kingdom, colder than Avalon.  
It was clear she didn’t want to wed him, he didn’t blame her, he didn’t want to wed her either.

  
They had to, they had no say in their lives. He learnt to deal with it, she learnt to sit in a puddle of distress and unnecessary hate.  
She was pretty, Dan was trying to get used to her face, he would be waking up to her face every day in a few months.

  
Black hair that clung to her head and cascaded in sharp waves. She looked like the sea, actually, her hair even had sea shells and pearls and blue shimmer- or was it green, he didn’t delve in the colour. Her skin was very white, like the clouds on a dark day at the beach. Her cheeks had tints of pink, it wasn’t completely devoid of colour- unlike her personality.

  
Her dress even carried the theme of the ocean. Sea foam teal and white.

  
Dan wished his attire could be themed like a place.

  
She didn’t represent the beach on a sunny day, she looked like the beach after a storm and Dan appreciated that.

  
She was very elegant, she hasn’t dropped her spoon yet- unlike her brother, Philip. He was far more clumsier than Dan assumed and he had poor timing. He arrived to their Feast a few hour late, right when Dan finally mustered up courage to ask about her day.  
She didn’t answer at all and he felt awkward and annoyed. He spent a good fifteen minutes trying to phrase a simple question together, at least she could answer.

  
Talking to her brother was easier, Philip didn’t look like he wanted to kill Dan so that was a plus. Philip looked a little like Alice. He was the beach, like her but instead of looking like a perfect storm, he looked like a sunny, afternoon.  
Well, that’s what his personality looked like, he himself looked like the beach at Winter.

  
No, he looked like the ocean at night on winter, to be more specific.

  
Dan shouldn’t be naming the royal family of Esterbury after metaphors but he couldn’t help it being the poet he was.

  
Queen Cecilia looked of a cold afternoon, nowhere near the ocean but near the desert, where the nights were colder.

  
Dan could see faint stars in her eyes but unlike everyone else’s bright stars, hers were dim. Maybe it was her youth slipping away or maybe it was because she was tired that particular night.

  
King Francis reminded him of dawn. The beginning of time and the time Dan’s mother forced him awake therefore the time of day he learnt to despise.

  
Little George was Saturday. The cute, ginger boy about 9 years of age. He was the freedom of Saturday, the day Dan had his princely duties off.

  
He was there to grow used to the storm at the beach, maybe even love her zaps of lightening and thunder.

  
He had an irrational fear of thunder and he didn’t like rain that much- he didn’t like the cold that much either.

  
He had to like her, she was ‘pretty’ and that was enough, according to his father but right now he would rather wed Philip than Alice.  
His favourite was George, he was funny and he even smiled at Dan at one point with his missing tooth.

  
The most talkative was King Francis, he didn’t mind, King Francis wasn’t talking to him anyways.

  
He played with his soup, no one told him to stop. His foot bounced up and down out of nervousness but no one told him to stop.  
Alice did, she kicked him under the table and he nearly knocked over his soup.

  
“Alice!” Philip hissed, his black fringe falling in front of his eyes. He apologised on her behalf and Dan smiled at him.  
Philip was nice, he told Dan he liked his dimples- he was caught off guard, it was a strange compliment. Affection for his dimples were only expressed by women who managed to get close to Dan. He thanked him and told him he liked his freckles that lined his cheeks.  
Alice rolled her eyes and Dan stopped talking to Philip.

  
He didn’t talk that much, no one talked to him until Queen Cecilia asked why he hadn’t touched his soup.

  
“Does our soup not appeal to you?” she asked.

  
“Oh no, I apologise, I’m just quite tired.”

  
“Do you wish to retire to your room?”

  
“No, I’m content here, thank you for your concern.”

  
There was a ball that night. They went from the Dining Hall to the ballroom. Philip was strangely excited.

  
“It’s why I’m here. I honestly would’ve stayed in the garden all night if there wasn’t a ball.” Philip said. and Dan felt a little offended, he wasn’t sure why but he did.

  
“I would’ve stayed in my room but I have to marry this oaf.” Alice sighed.

  
“Don’t be ill-tempered, he can hear you.”

  
“I don’t care, in all honesty.”

  
They were both a little rude. She talked bad about Dan for the whole night and Philip listened.

  
Dan stood by the corner, drinking his wine and tracing lines on the wall.

  
He didn’t wish to be here, there was no one to talk to. His future wife hated him, apparently, even though he hadn’t uttered a word to her at all.

  
Philip was- he was torn. He was nice for complimenting Dan but he wasn’t for agreeing with the nonsense Alice said about him.  
Philip was a sunrise, Dan changed his mind. No one cared enough to stay up to stare at a sunrise unless they suffered from insomnia. Dan would rather sleep through a sunrise

  
George talked to him. He wanted to get a roll from the table and he saw Dan sitting all by himself and he asked why.

  
“I like being by myself.”

  
“No you don’t.” George said simply, “You look depressed, Prince Daniel. Are you depressed?”

  
“No, I’m not, are you?”

  
“Most certainly not! Alice is, a little bit, she wouldn’t come out of her room yesterday, she didn’t want to meet you.”

  
“I’ve noticed.”

  
“She doesn’t like you at all.”

  
“I know.“

  
“She thinks you’re horrid-“

  
“That’s enough, George.” Philip said and he steered George away from Dan and he was lonely once again. Philip sat by him few minutes later.

  
“Would you like a carnation?”

  
Dan’s never heard anything as random as that.

  
“Pardon me?”

  
“It’s an apology, in a form of a flower. Contradictorily, it doesn’t symbolise an apology, it represents true love which is not the case here, I’m obviously not here to confess my undying love to a mere stranger but for tonight, may we erase the true meaning and slot in the necessary one? I’m sorry.”

  
“There’s no need to apologise, Prince Philip, you did no wrong deed.”

  
“Alice has and I apologise on her behalf.”

  
“If she was truly sorry, she would tell me in person.”

  
“She’s not sorry at all, she doesn’t care but I am and I care. I’m ashamed of her ill behaviour and I would like to apologise.”  
Dan’s eyes widened but he smiled too.

  
Philip didn’t say anything else, he offered a small smile- a smirk nearly and he handed Dan the flower.

  
He moved over to some women by the table and he offered them his hand.

  
They took it with a giggle and he twirled them into the waltz.

  
Dan watched and he sighed.

  
Dan changed his mind, Phil wasn’t a sunrise, he was a red carnation. He didn’t care enough to look for the meaning but he was sure Phil meant something deep and thoughtful.


	2. SUNFLOWER

Dan was rather annoyed with himself. Why did he label Philip as a flower? He’s not a flower- Dan had a theme. Everyone of royal in Esterbury followed a theme. Time and place. They were as tiresome as a Monday morning or they were as hollow as an abandoned castle. They were not flowers. They were not stars. They were something unavoidable, something that existed, something Dan really didn’t care for.

  
Philip reminded him of forget me nots, it was his eyes, blue and wide.

  
It didn’t fit, a bright forget me not in a winter beach.

  
No, Dan refused to label him as something other than a time or a place- He had a strict theme, he mustn’t stray from it.

  
He sighed, Philip really wasn’t that important, why was he losing sleep over him?

  
He was a star, Dan thought, he could be the biggest star or the brightest star, everyone told him he was different, that he was the prettiest star but from Earth, they all looked the same.

  
Phil was just as average as Alice.

  
Dan slapped himself, there he went comparing Philip to a star, in other people’s eyes, stars are pretty and so are flowers and he couldn’t metaphorically call Phil something pretty- that's unfair compared to the gloomy comparisons others have to deal with.

  
He didn’t really care but he wasn’t in the mood to offend strangers and leave yet another bad impression.

  
Phil could be a meadow.

  
A meadow with green grass and a tall waterfall and millions of flowers and cherry blossoms.

  
But a meadow was a stark contrast against dull deserts and gloomy storms.

  
Phil was so problematic, why did he have to be nice?

  
Dan could rearrange everyone else’s metaphor, to fit them with Phil’s strangely bright comparison but everyone else was too dull.  
They were all too boring.

  
Phil was the splotch of red in a monochrome background, Dan wasn’t satisfied with that because his theme wasn’t based off colours and Phil really wasn’t that important.

  
Phil helped Dan find his room the night before. It was next to Alice’s, King Francis thought it would help Alice bond but no. Alice asked Phil to switch rooms with him so Phil led him to his room which was stuffed with flowers and all things pretty.

  
He asked two times if Dan was allergic and Dan shook his head with a smile. Phil grinned back of course.

  
“I’ll see you tomorrow maybe.”

  
“Definitely.” Phil nodded and he skipped out of his room.

  
The next morning Dan was found in the Dining Hall and his breakfast was now nothing but a few crumbs. He stared out at his fingers and he was confused.  
What was he meant to do now?

  
He walked around the halls for thirty minutes because he was lost now.

  
Phil found him and he was just as confused.

  
“What are you doing?”

  
“I’m lost.” Dan answered and Phil grinned again.

  
“Why are you lost?”

  
“That’s a dimwitted question.”

  
“Is insulting my question a way of avoiding it?”

  
“I was bored and I decided to explore.” Dan said, scuffing his foot against the marble floor.

  
“I’m here, there’s no need to be bored. Hey! I’ll give you a grand tour, you shan’t get lost anymore,” and Phil grabbed his hand and he pulled him through halls and rooms and corners.

  
He knew every detail and everything had a story, apparently. Phil had a good memory, that’s all Dan learnt.

  
“Alice and I were running around and she tripped me. I fell and lost a tooth.” Phil said, pointing to a crack on the walls.

  
“Is that why there’s a crack on the wall?”

  
“Heavens no, the crack reminds me of that unfortunate moment.” Phil giggled and Dan titled his head because men didn’t giggle.

  
Phil cleared his throat and offered a questionable chuckle but Dan liked his giggle better.

  
Phil circled him around to the biggest window in the castle and he nearly pushed Dan off to his death.

  
“The view’s beautiful.” Dan said.

  
“The view is better in the tower.”

  
“It’s pretty, still.” Dan leaned out the window and he leaned out too far. Phil pushed him but his fingers were firmly clasped to Dan’s fingers. Dan wouldn’t fall, Phil wasn’t mean.

  
Dan complained about that for what seemed like an hour.

  
“I could’ve died!”

  
“Would you like to be remembered as a murderer?”

  
“You’re so immature, Philip!”

  
Phil only stuck his tongue out and his forget me not eyes sparkled.

  
“I wouldn’t let you fall, Daniel.”

  
“What was that stunt, then? You’re lucky I have reflexes!”

  
“You’re lucky I held your hand.” Phil said and he pulled Dan up the stairs.

  
“My whole life flashed before my eyes.” Dan said. “It really wasn’t that interesting.”

  
“Was I in your little vision?” Phil asked.

  
“Nay.”

  
“That explains why it was so boring.”

  
Dan would’ve punched him playfully but he wasn’t sure if they were at that level of friendship.

  
Dan was tired after climbing the stairs so they both sat down on one of the steps, serving as an obstacle to hurried maids and annoyed butlers.

  
“Your hair has grass sticking through it.” Dan said and Phil ruffled his hair.

  
“Oh, I was gardening.” Phil said.

  
“I never understood gardening.” Dan sighed.

  
“What do you mean? Gardening is a simple concept.”

  
“Yes but what’s the point? Plants take so long to grow, some grow during a specific season, if you’re not careful, they wilt away.”

  
“Like people, Daniel.”

  
Dan was introduced to a bundle of new metaphors. A bunch of similes. A group of comparisons.

  
They climbed the stairs again and Dan wasn’t bored at all.

  
He was very tired but he didn’t mind that much because Phil was a little interesting and his stories were a little interesting and his ramblings were a tad bit interesting but that didn’t mean much to Dan.

  
It did, a little because Dan didn’t find anyone interesting. everyone was black and white and sometimes people were a shade more indigo than black but they were still dull.

  
Phil was interesting. But only a little.

  
They were in the highest tower now and Dan hung onto the curtains when he peered outisde, he didn’t want Phil to push him off and succeed.  
Phil did try again and this time Dan noticed how Phil grabbed his hand in a secure grip before he pushed Dan.

  
“Is the end of my tour?” Dan asked as he seated the window sill and stared out the window. The view was pretty, he could see the whole of Esterbury and he felt powerful.

  
“No.”

  
“Do we have to climb more?”

  
“No.”

  
They didn’t get up, Dan just stared out the window and Phil just stared at Dan.

  
He silently scrutinised Daniel because Daniel was as peculiar as him.

  
There was no point noting down all the obvious things, Phil ignored his pretty face and his pretty hair and his pretty body. Phil just looked at how the wind hit his cheeks to the point where his face was pale and his cheeks were tinted red- but noting that meant noting Dan’s pretty face and Phil was supposed to avoid obvious things.

  
He noted down the two dots by his dimple that made a sad face each time he smiled and sometimes Phil felt that emotionally.  
Dan caught him staring but he didn’t say anything, he just stared back and it was a staring competition now and Phil really liked those.

  
“I’m good at these contests.” Phil said, holding his gaze.

  
“So am I, Philip.”

  
“I haven’t lost.”

  
“You’re not intimidating.” Dan said and Phil stopped talking and just stared.

  
Alice walked in and she was quite startled to see Daniel but Dan didn’t flinch, his eyes were locked on Phil’s and only Phil’s.

  
Phil didn’t expect this at all, he was sure Dan and Alice would be having a staring contest by now and he would be the one to interrupt but strangely, Dan’s future wife- the lady Dan was supposed to woo- was the third wheel.

  
Alice cleared her throat but their gazes weren’t broken at all.

  
“You’re not meant to be here.” She said.

  
“Neither are you.” Phil retorted.

  
“I was talking to Daniel, why is he here?”

  
“I’m giving him a tour.”

  
“Since when did tours equal to gazing into each other’s eyes?” Phil blinked and he blinked again and he blinked three more times.

  
Dan snorted and he laughed lightly because ha, he won.

  
“I win.”

  
“Get out, the tower is out of bounds.” She directed and Dan raised and eyebrow.

  
“If it’s out of bounds then why are you here? I’m sure the rules don’t apply to just Philip and I.”

  
She glowered at him and her eyebrows were knotted together. She was a little selfish and Dan didn’t like that.

  
She acted like the superior and she acted like she was out of Dan’s league. It wasn’t true and Dan knew that.

  
She wanted him to beg her to like him, her attitude showed that clearly. She was waiting for an apology though Dan did no wrong deed.

  
She was used to being treated like a diamond, men write poems about her eyes and rare smile while he compares her to frosty storms.  
He had nothing to prove really, he didn’t need to prove himself worthy of a brat because he really wasn’t. Again, he would rather wed Philip than Alice.

  
“You have no right to talk to me like that.”

  
“Does my tone of common sense offend you?”

  
“The fact I’m to wed you in a few months offends me.”

  
Philip dragged Daniel away before Dan could say anything. Alice was still there glowering but Dan was talking to Phil like nothing happened.  
“I apologise, she wasn’t lying, the tower is out of bounds, I just wanted to show you the view.”

  
“The view was worth getting shouted at.” Dan smiled and Phil grinned with him.

  
“I request we continue our staring contest.” Phil said and they were in the middle of the staircase again.

  
“Continue? I won.”

  
“That’s not fair, Alice distracted me.”

  
“She distracted me too but you blinked before me. Hush Philip, I won.”

  
Phil grumbled under his breath and Dan laughed because Phil was such a child.

  
“You’re child.”

  
“I’m older than you.”

  
“By what?”

  
“Four years or so.”

  
“You’re still a child.”

  
“You’re an elderly lady.”

  
“Don’t talk bad about your sister.”

  
Phil choked but he laughed too.

  
Dan ran into Alice once again. It was midnight and he couldn’t sleep and he walked around aimlessly in the halls and apparently she was in the same situation.

  
“What are you doing?” She asked when his face startled her. He looked of a floating head, the gold candlelight illuminating parts of his face.

  
“Taking a stroll, what about you?”

  
“That’s none of your concern.”

  
“I told you why I’m here.” He shrugged.

  
"What? And it would be fair for me to tell you why I am?”

  
“Yes?”

  
“Daniel, grow up, we’re not here to trade secrets.” She said, “I’m marrying a child, this is disgusting.”

  
“You lack of colour, dear Alice. I’m marrying someone as monochrome as a winter storm.”

  
Alice didn’t really understand, mostly because he mumbled half of it but she knew he was reciting poetry and for once it wasn’t a sonnet about her ocean blue eyes or star like smile.

  
It was kinda refreshing to not be compared to the rarest of sapphires.


	3. CHERRY BLOSSOMS

Phil liked stitching, a little bit but he didn’t know how to stitch. All the stitching lessons their governess had planned were for Alice, being the lady. Unfortunately that meant all the fencing lessons were for Phil and only Phil. He was shit at it, he stabbed his father three times when he was meant to be dodging.

  
Anyways, this metaphor wasn’t about fencing, it was about stitching. Phil didn’t know how to stitch but he knew that for two pieces of cloth to bound together, there needed to be tight stitches that entwined the seams.

  
Dan could be the red piece of fabric and Alice could be the blue. He needed to somehow tie them together so he offered to be the needle.

  
He set up a picnic at one point, near his garden. It was under an apple tree and there were hyacinths everywhere.  
He had a red blanket and a basket of food.

  
“What are you doing, Philip?”

  
Phil panicked, he fell over actually.

  
“I- uhm, I’m climbing up trees. I’m going to collect some apples.” Phil excused and Dan snorted.

  
“What’s the blanket for?”

  
“I- for a soft landing. If I fall over.”

  
Dan laughed, “And the basket?”

  
“If I get hungry?”

  
Dan shook his head but it was cute. He didn’t question it but he climbed up the tree with Phil.

  
Dan laughed, he doesn’t really laugh that much but with Phil existing, he couldn’t stop smiling. He threw some golden leaves at Phil and Phil growled at him.

  
“Stop! I’ll fall over!”

  
Dan didn’t stop, he threw more leaves.

  
“Dan!”

  
“Dan?”

  
Phil giggled and nodded. “Dan.”

  
“A shortened version of my name?”

  
“Obviously! Are you stupid?”

  
“You’re stupid, Phil.” Dan laughed, he liked Dan, Dan felt better than Daniel.

  
“Phil?”

  
“Phil.”

  
“I like Phil.” Phil nodded, giving him his approval.

  
“I like Phil too.” He meant it in many ways.

  
They never strayed from those nicknames.

  
Phil never strayed from that tree and they stayed on the top the whole day because why not?

  
“You said you wrote poems.” Phil said, he was sat on a branch near the top, his legs dangled dangerously. Dan munched on a ripe apple and he leaned against the trunk of the tree.

  
“Mm,” Dan muttered and Phil stared at him.

  
“So? Read one to me.” Phil asked and he stared up at the sky- or the bits of the sky he could see through leaves.

  
“You think I know one by heart?”

  
“Do you?”

  
“Well, yes but it’s quite shite.”

  
“I don’t mind, please?”

  
Dan grumbled a ‘fine,’ because he forgot how to say no. How could he say no when Phil looked so ready and hopeful? The bit of the sky were like small gates to heaven which opened only for Phil. Light shone down from them, the rays of sunlight settling over Phil’s relaxed face and he really was an angel.

  
“Alright, so, you wouldn’t understand but never mind.”

  
Phil was waiting and Dan cleared his throat.

  
And it was a beautiful poem about sour flowers and tired laughs.

It was a finely written poem about locked hearts and closing corridors.

Dan stumbled over the bit where he compared footsteps to thudding thunder.

Dan choked when he described how blue his eyes were.

Dan struggled to finish the poem with a sweet rhyme.

  
Phil’s eyes were closed and he hummed because that was really long but it was really beautiful.

  
“It’s terrible, I picked a shit one.”

  
“No, no, it was beautiful. Don’t doubt yourself, it’s brilliant.”

  
Dan didn’t argue because he didn’t want to wreck the peaceful look Phil had on. Eyes closed and lips mouthing over specific words. Dan realised he was repeating some phrases from his poem.

  
The poem was for Phil of course, Dan didn’t know if he knew or not.

  
He thought it was fitting for the moment.

  
“Forget me nots are beautiful.” Phil said suddenly. "Do you like flowers, Dan?”

  
“Not that much.”

  
Phil nearly fell out of the tree.

  
“We can’t be friends.”

  
“Oh hush, it’s normal for me to dislike things everyone favours. Flowers? Alright, Stars? I don’t see the big deal."

  
“I would hit you but alas, you’re too far away.” Phil said. “You don’t like the stars? Flowers?”

  
“You’re such a girl, honestly.” Dan said and Phil frowned a little.

  
“Is it so wrong to like things that’s considered feminine?” Phil asked and Prince Dan sighed.

  
“I don’t know, my father would skin me if I gave strangers red carnations.” Phil hit him playfully.

  
“But you don’t like stars?”

  
“What’s there to like? They’re just there, they don’t do anything.”

  
Phil nodded, he didn’t agree but he accepted it.

  
“I like stars because, like you said, they’re just there. They’re reliable, when I can’t turn to anyone they’re there. I don’t have to tell them anything, they’ll know. Whenever I can’t sleep, I stare at the stars. They calm me.”

  
Dan never really thought of it that way.

  
“I should try that sometime.”

  
“Philip? Philip!” Alice’s shrieks side through their silence and Phil called over Alice.

“Have you seen Daniel? Father wants him.”

  
‘I’m right here.” Dan said and he climbed down.

  
She sighed and she dragged Dan away.

  
‘Bye Phil!” He called out and Phil waved.

  
“Phil, eh? Why’re you suddenly chummy with my brother?” She asked and she looked defensive.

  
“Because I like him, he’s nicer and better company than you.”

  
“You wouldn’t know, Prince Daniel, you’ve never spent a day with me.”

  
“Do you really blame me? You walk the other way the second I come near, there’s no point trying.”

  
She bristled.

  
“Did you think I would be persistence? That I would beg for your approval?” He asked and she didn’t answer.

  
“I’m sorry, Princess Alice, to disappoint.” He said and they walked in silence.

  
King Francis wanted to fence and Dan was a little confused. It was a manly way of getting to know each other and Alice was to quietly sit by the side and watch.

  
She looked ready to kill everyone, not because of Dan but because he was doing it wrong. He could feel her whispering to herself, “Block, parry, dodge it.”

  
Dan did the opposite.

  
“Maybe you should let Alice have a go.” He was serious.

  
King Francis roared with laughter and he teared up even.

  
“Are you mocking me?” She asked with force, standing up.

  
“No, I promise.” Dan said and apparently that was funny because King Francis would not stop laughing.

  
“A lady? With a sword? They mustn't have a weapon designed for men in their dainty hands, Daniel.”

  
She ran away and he ran after her because King Francis was wrong.

“Princess, stop, please, I didn’t wish to offend you.”

  
“I do not appreciate your tone.”

  
“An honest tone? I wasn’t lying nor did I mock.”

  
“I couldn’t wield a sword.”

  
“Phil says otherwise.” Dan said and his look was of trust.

  
“Do you not doubt Philip?”

  
“Not hardly.”

  
She smiled and Dan thought it was pretty.

  
“You have a pretty smile,” It was an obligatory compliment. She didn’t blush at all but she smiled brighter.

  
“You should be able to wield a sword.” Dan said, “Lady or not.”

  
“Thank you Daniel.”

  
She could tolerate Dan.

  
She didn’t immediately grow nicer to Dan but she offered the tiniest of smiles once and Phil felt proud. Dan didn’t care that much, he offered her a bigger smile- it was compulsory.

  
It was night once again and he found Phil in his balcony and he was on the floor.

  
“You’ll catch a cold, Phil.”

  
“I don’t mind.”

  
Dan looked up to see what he was staring so intensely at.

  
“The stars, they speak to me.”

  
“I’m sure they do.” Dan said, resisting an urge to roll his eyes.

  
‘Don’t mock me, let me be.”

  
Dan sat beside Phil and he stared at the stars for a long, long time.

  
Dan wanted to compare Phil to this moment. He wasn’t a lone star nor was he a carnation. He wasn’t a winter beach but a chilly moment.

  
Dan didn’t know how to describe this moment but he knew it was near perfect.

  
They were sat on Phil’s cold balcony in nothing but thin pyjamas. The cold was nipping at their cheeks and neck and the wind ruffled their hair. It was freezing but Dan felt warm, next to Phil. They didn’t need to fill the silences with laughs or words.

  
The sky was there, it didn’t need to be a pretty object, it wasn’t scrawled with colour like the many sunsets Dan had written about. It was devoid of colour but it was nice in a way because the stars shined brighter and the moon glowed more.

  
Dan didn’t know what to write, he was speechless so he stayed silent.  
Whatever this moment was, it was Phil’s personal metaphor.


	4. FORGET ME NOTS

Phil was just- he didn’t know what to feel. He shouldn’t be talking to Dan like this- Alice was supposed to. He wasn’t supposed to be this close to him, Alice was meant to be laughing at his stupid jokes and making fun of him.

  
They were getting closer and Phil was a bit happier. He didn’t want his little sister to be stuck with someone she didn’t know how to talk to, she didn’t want to be with someone she hated gutless.

  
She didn’t sneer at Dan anymore and Dan smiled at her a lot when she passed.

  
Phil caught them fencing together and he clapped- which was peculiar apparently.

  
They weren’t angry at each other, Alice was teaching Dan to fence.

  
They were having fun, Phil observed. He wasn’t sure but they were laughing and that was good.

  
Alice skilfully waved her sword around and Dan weakly blocked most attacks and she laughed because he was pathetic. She didn’t mean it in a bad way, of course.

  
“Come on! You’re a weakling, use your upper body strength.” She said and he tried.

  
Phil was sat on the side as he watched. He had one leg crossed over the other and Queen Cecilia came to check up on them.

  
“Don’t sit like a lady, Philip, sit properly, where’s your posture?” She ordered and she scolded Alice for touching the sword. She would’ve yelled, she would’ve exploded if it wasn’t for Dan’s presence.

  
She took away the sword and Alice crossed her arms.

  
“I hate it when she does that.” Alice said and looked down at her feet.

  
“Me too, what if I want to sit like a lady? What if I giggle? What if I collect flowers and what if I wear makeup?”

  
“You wear makeup?” Dan asked.

  
“Well, once. I looked stupid.” Phil sighed and they walked to Phil’s garden because that’s the only place their parents didn’t bother them.

  
Phil lied on the grass and he stared at the clouds. Alice laid beside him and Dan sat between them.

  
They talked a lot and it hit Dan how strange he was.

  
They didn’t talk about painting flowers nor did they talk about life as a rabbit.

  
Alice wasn’t strange at all and that bothered Dan a little.

  
“What a peculiar thing to say.” She said when Dan muttered something about a cloud that allowed humans to travel places. He didn’t say much but he listened.

  
Listening got boring after a while mostly because she was kind of boring but also because she complained about everything.  
Dan fiddled with Phil’s bush of forget me nots and he stuck five of them in Phil’s hair. Phil giggled and Alice scolded him for it.  
“Don’t kill all my flowers.” Phil said.

  
“You have a ton of these.” Dan said and placed the blue flower on his nose. I slid down to his cheek and he laughed loudly. He took the flower in his fingers and he stared.

  
“Forget me not.” He said.

  
“I shan’t.” Dan answered and Phil grinned, sending more flowers piled on his nose to topple down.

  
“No, the flower, they’re called forget me nots.”

  
Dan let out a sigh of content and decorated Phil’s black hair with small, blue flowers.

  
Phil was a little annoyed because Dan should be decorating Alice’s hair- she had more hair anyways plus they were to be wed. Phil had short hair and men don’t stick flowers in other men’s hair, right?

  
Alice should be the one with a head full of flowers and Dan should be looking at her with that specific stare.

  
Phil wasn’t sure if he was exaggerating it or that he was upside down but Dan looked at him strangely. It wasn’t a normal look you would give to a best friend, no, Dan had hearts behind that glassy stare.

  
Phil’s seen his father stare at his mother like that and Phil was very much confused because he didn’t find it weird at all; he very much liked this specific kind of stare.

  
Alice left a little later, after Dan had a ten minute conversation with her about something Phil really didn’t care about.   
Dan still stuck flowers in Phil’s hair, hell he made a flower crown for Phil.

  
“What do forget me nots mean?” Dan asked after Alice left without a single flower in her hair.

  
“Hmm? It represents true love.”

  
Dan groaned, “Everything represents true love! What does a carnation mean? Love, a rose? Love, of course, Aster? Love!”

  
“I’m surprised you even know what an Aster is.”

  
“Please, that’s my mother’s favourite flower.” Dan said and Phil smiled widely.

  
Phil got up quickly and some forget me nots fell out of is hair. He came back with an orange flower.

  
“What’s this?” Dan asked.

  
“It’s an orange lily.”

  
“And?”

  
“It represents hatred.” Phil giggled. He was on his knees now with the flower, he stared up at Dan- who was also on his knees but Dan was still somehow taller.

  
“Oh, thank you Phil. I hate you too.” Dan said and Phil laughed loudly. He fell over of course, on top of Dan but they didn’t seem to grow flustered at all- by they, Phil meant Dan. Dan laughed it off but Phil’s cheeks were as red as the roses behind him.

  
He really shouldn’t be reacting like this, it didn’t mean anything but Phil did. He felt nervous and kinda excited- he didn’t know how to explain it at all but he had butterflies and bees in his stomach. He might’ve had wasps too.

  
Dan pushed him off and he rolled on top of Phil, his laughs muffled as he pressed his face into Phil’s chest.

  
Phil could feel everything, his chest vibrated and Dan’s laughs sent chills everywhere but he was hot at the same time- it wasn’t a good combination and he was dying.

  
He didn’t understand anything, there was no reason for him to feel this but it continued anyways.

  
“Phil?” Dan looked at him with his honey dew eyes and Phil crumbled like a colosseum. “I don’t understand this flower language.”

  
“I’ll teach you.”

  
They spent the whole day in the middle of Phil’s garden with their legs crossed over.

  
“This is an Asphodel, this means ‘my regrets follow you to your grave,’” Phil explained, handing Dan the flower to inspect closely.  
Phil picked up a yellow rose.

  
“What does it mean? A yellow rose?” Dan asked, staring at the flower.

  
“The happier meanings are friendship and extreme emotion.” Phil answered happily, sticking the flower behind Dan’s ear.

  
“The sadder meanings?”

  
“Extreme betrayal and- um, broken heart.” Phil said sadly.

  
“Broken heart? Have you had any of those, Phil?”

  
“Nope! Hopefull I never will.”

  
Phil casually moved onto the next flower.

  
“Amaryllis.” Phil said and he handed him the white and red flower and so far, that was his favourite. “It represents pride.”

  
"This one’s my favourite,” Dan said and lightly smacked Phil with it. Phil’s smiles were lost under the soft petals and Dan slowly trailed the flower down.

  
It traced down Phil’s cheek and it curved around his jawline. It dipped to his neck and Phil closed his eyes as he imagined Dan’s fingers instead.

  
Dan expected a ticklish laugh but he only received silence but that was ok because he liked it when Phil looked content and relaxed. his eyes were closed and his head lolled back a little. His mouth was parted a little bit and he looked really, really pretty.

  
Like blue orchids against snow.

  
Phil snapped out of his thoughts because they weren’t appropriate at all and he should be ashamed.

  
He could get killed for his thoughts- he shook them away.

  
“Uh, this is a borage.” Phil said quickly and shoved another flower into Dan’s hands. “It symbolises courage.”

  
“This is a- a hibiscus.” Phil said as he handed the last flower to Dan.”For rare and delicate beauty.”

  
Dan twirled te flower between his fingers.

  
“You should give that to Alice.” Phil said- well, stuttered out.

  
“Hmm, I was thinking of giving it to you.”

  
Phil blushed, his cheeks matched the pink hibiscus well.

  
“Oh, is my beauty rare?” Phil asked and Dan nodded.  
  
Dan looked at the sky, the moon was rising up and he stared at the castle behind them.

  
“Come on, I’m quite starving.”

  
Phil couldn’t really eat, his stomach was rumbling ferociously but not with hunger but with wasps and bees.  
Dan kicked his foot at one point and he kicked back and they had a little fight that made Dan laugh out loud. Alice tutted, muttering something about ‘a childish husband.’

  
That thought made Phil a little sad- he shouldn’t be, oh God, this was messed up. He retired to his room early and he slapped himself five time because he shouldn’t be acting like this.

  
What was wrong with him?

  
He poked his head out an hour later because he heard Dan’s voice.

  
No one saw him but he did see Dan running his fingers through his hair as he blushed profusely. He had the hibiscus in his hand and he held it out for Alice who smiled so wide that even her eyes twinkled. Or maybe that was the odd lighting, Phil didn’t care.  
He saw Alice accept the hibiscus and he saw Dan smile brighter than anything.


	5. HYDRANGEAS

The good news was that Alice was beginning to like Dan. Dan could see the bits of red tinting her cheeks when he offered a friendly smile and at one point she stumbled over his words because she was too caught up in how Dan licked his lips.

  
The bad news was that Dan didn’t give a damn anymore. He used to be so caught up in all the little things about her, he would overthink little actions (“She winked at me! Does that mean she likes me? Is she warming up? Phil, whats’s happening?” He said and Phil replied with, “She had dust in her eyes.”)

  
Now he was caught up in Phil.

  
He liked hovering over him when Phil stared at the clouds and talked about everything. He liked hovering above because he could just stare at Phil without feeling ashamed.

  
Alice was pretty, Dan had said but Phil, oh Phil was prettier. His black hair was a sharp contrast against his white skin. He was a black funeral against molten snow- Dan shook his head, that comparison was too depressing for someone like Phil.

  
He was the raven feather Dan used to collect in his younger years from the snow. It was a strange thing he did but every time the frost appeared on his windows he would dash out and pick up all the black feathers the crows left on the snow. He liked the contrast- Phil’s contrast was Dan’s childhood.

  
His eyes were blue but at the same time it wasn’t. It wasn’t the same blue as Alice’s eyes, her eyes were grey compared to his.  
His eyes- they were a rainbow of cool colours. Subtle greens and calming yellows were swirled in his irises. The blue was simply the shade of the canvas he had. He had far more colours splattered onto them.

  
Dan used to think blue was a sad colour but then he met Phil.

  
He had beauty spots and freckles everywhere, nearly. Sometimes Dan would connect the dots to make constellations and Dan felt very poetic about it.

  
Dan should be getting closer to Alice, she was why he was here but Phil was why he wanted to stay.

  
Dan liked tucking in flowers into Phil’s hair because all the colours looked so bright in contrast to his black hair and he looked like an angel with a halo of pink flowers.

  
He wouldn’t dare touch the flowers that were most precious to Phil- he stuck to smaller flowers, the ones Phil could grow quickly.  
He laced hydrangeas in Phil’s hair. He made a gradient, the blue faded to purple faded to pink.

  
Phil was very pleased so he made Dan a flower crown- an actual flower crown of out of the same flowers. Dan just talked while Phil made the crown.

  
“I would paint a white rose black.” Dan said.

  
“Why would you do that?”

  
“To be poetic.”

  
“Is this another one of your metaphors?” Phil asked.

  
“Don’t you like my metaphors?”

  
“I like your metaphors, just, why are they so sad?” Phil asked and Dan frowned.

  
His metaphors for Phil were never sad but then again, he had never said them out loud.

  
“Are your metaphors a metaphor for something?” Phil asked, “Are you sad, Dan?”

  
“Why would I be sad? I have a good life.”

  
“You can still be sad, you’re allowed to feel things.”

  
Dan was sad because he liked Phil more than Alice and that wasn’t supposed to happen. Things weren’t going to plan and that was so frustrating and he hated himself.

  
Maybe in another universe people would accept his attraction to Phil but right now he would be burnt at stake for an emotion he was meant to feel for women only.

  
He was sad because he wasn’t normal and he felt sick, absolutely sick because he seriously considered marrying Phil over Alice. He was mocking before but now he could see himself in Phil’s hands, exchanging vows.

  
That couldn’t happen of course because Phil was a man and Dan was a man too and it wasn’t right.

  
It shouldn’t feel right, then, if it was so wrong.

  
“Dan? Are you ok?” Phil asked.

  
“Huh- I, yes, I apologise.”

  
“Are you feeling well? Shall we go back inside?”

  
“Yes.” They both got up. Phil had a lot of flowers on his hair and and he placed the limp crown on top of Dan’s hair. It looked wonky but Dan really liked it.

  
They went back inside and Dan was dragged away from Phil. It was Alice and she had pink on he cheeks.

  
“Hello Daniel, father has invited you to a picnic. We shall leave by this afternoon.” She said and he smiled because he was polite.  
He didn’t like the picnic that much because he didn’t get to spend most of it with Phil as Phil wasn’t there.

  
“You two spend enough time together. Get to know Alice, at least.” Queen Cecilia said and Dan nodded. They sat by a pond and Alice silently watched the ducks.

  
It was far too silent- Dan didn’t like it at all.

  
He talked with her and she conversed back. She was far more into the conversation than Dan because he was kind of thinking of Phil. He shook the thought away and continued chatting lightly.

  
“You’re not that bad of a person.” She said and he blushed.

  
“Neither are you.”

  
“Philip says you write poems.”

  
“Yes, I do.”

  
“Would you read one to me?”

  
“I’m sorry, Alice, I only read out poetry to those who are special to me.” Dan said but she didn’t look that hurt. She understood, they haven’t talked that much.

  
“You’ve recited a poem for Philip."

  
“He must be special to me.”

  
He ended up reading out a poem to Alice at the end. He felt like he needed to, they were to be wed anyways.

  
She took him around the pond, away from their parents. They were behind a tree now.

  
She said something to him but he found it hard to pay attention because he was surrounded in amaryllis and hibiscus and he could only think of Phil.

  
He was surrounded in Phil’s scent and he missed him a little.

  
“Well, Daniel?” She said and he looked at her, eyebrows raised. “Aren’t you going to kiss me, after my speech?”

  
“I apologise, I’m bad at this.”

  
She giggled and sighed.

  
“I would tell you I like you.” She was inching closer. “You would tell me the same and we would stare into each other's eyes.”

  
“You would lean down.”

  
He leaned down.

  
“I would lean up.”

  
She leaned up.

  
“And we would meet in the middle.”

  
She kissed him and he kissed her. It was a kiss that left her breathless and him confused because he was meant to feel things.  
It was nice, the kiss.

  
It wasn’t anything worth writing poems about, it was simply nice.

  
He didn’t blush nor did he lean down for more. He kissed her again because she leaned up, expectantly and he didn’t want to seem rude or impolite.

  
He felt a little broken because the poems he read, the sonnets- they described kisses so vividly, like it was amazing, like it was the best feeling in he world.

  
Dan didn’t feel that at all so he leaned down to kiss her one final time but he made the mistake of thinking about Phil.

  
He imagined Phil’s peach lips and Phil’s Aster touch. He imagined Phil’s Wisteria hands, cupping his cheeks delicately.

  
That was the best kiss out of the three and he wasn’t sure whether to feel pleased or ashamed because in his mind he wasn’t kissing Alice, he was kissing her brother.

  
He was silent for the rest of the day and he didn’t dare to look at Phil when he came back.

  
He felt so ashamed and embarrassed and sick, he was sick. He was disgusting he wasn’t normal he shouldn’t- this was all wrong.  
Maybe he was ill mentally, he was panicked.

  
Maybe it was because he spent too much time with Phil, he should distance himself.

  
So he spent most of his week with Alice who began to like him even more but now he was sure he was messed in a way because he missed Phil a bit too much.

  
He missed his Sunflower grins and Mertensia eyes. He missed his Lily skin and his black forest hair that was usually littered in small hydrangeas or forget me nots.

  
Dan was never a fan of flowers, to him they were pretty objects and he was oblivious to their meaning. Phil was like flowers, actually, Dan used to think he was one of the many bits of grey in a monochrome painting but after getting to know him, he had a lot more meaning.

  
Phil meant a lot of Dan and that confused Dan.

  
He didn’t like Phil normally, he looked at Phil like Alice looked at Dan.

  
He really liked Phil and he hated how sad he looked when Dan walked away from him because he was to avoid him.

  
He didn’t talk to Phil but he knocked on his door a little after midnight and Phil stared at him quizzically.

  
“I can’t sleep.” Dan said.

  
“That’s not any of my concern.”

  
Phil was annoyed and he was angry but he let Dan in.

  
Dan tried to carry on a normal conversation with him but Phil glared at him.

  
“Daniel.” Dan froze, “You honestly expect me to talk to you normally? After one week of you avoiding me, I deserve answers.”   
“I- I’m sorry.”

  
“A stuttered apology isn’t an answer.”

  
“I was going through something, I- you wouldn’t understand.” Dan looked at his feet. Phil marched up to him and gently tilted his head up with his finger.

  
“Then tell me.”

  
They were so close and Dan wasn’t sure if this was good or bad for him.

  
“It’s too embarrassing, it’s too personal but I’m very sorry.”

  
Phil didn’t push him any further, his eyes dropped down to the floor a little. He looked sad and Dan tipped his head up.  
“I’m over it now, it won’t happen again.”

  
He wasn’t over it, not in that sense but he had learnt to accept it, kind of, he didn’t think it was as dirty as before.  
He really liked Phil and not as a best friend but as a one sided lover.

  
Dan wouldn’t stop writing poems and he wouldn’t stop making metaphors except there was a difference this time. All his metaphors were happier than usual.

  
Phil nodded, he accepted his apology and they both sat out in Phil’s balcony to stare at the stars again.

  
When Phil fell asleep on Dan’s shoulder he didn’t think of him disgusting for thinking about kissing him.

  
It was wrong, he thought as he stared at the stars but he found it so exhilarating. The forbidden factor made it so…appealing and it sent shivers down his spine.

  
He stared at Phil’s content expression and he would happily stare at it all night.

  
He woke up Phil at one point because the wind was biting at his cheeks, making them paler than usual and goosebumps were erupting from his skin.

  
“Don’t go.” Phil said when he was tucked in and Dan was about to leave.

  
“Pardon?”

  
“I missed you. Stay here for tonight.”

  
Dan used to think he would be hearing those words from Alice, not Phil.

  
He stayed, he sat by the window but Phil tutted and pulled him into the bed.

  
“Come on, I don’t want you to freeze to death.”

  
They didn’t cuddle. Dan had accepted his sudden fondness towards Phil but he wouldn’t act upon it. Phil would hate him, Alice could hate him, King Fran- he could die.

  
He knew what the penalty was for homosexual acts and it wasn’t a good one.

  
Dan didn’t dare touch Phil but Phil had his hand in his own.

  
So Phil slept amongst oblivious dreams and Dan stayed a silent sinner.


	6. LEMON GRASS

Alice and Dan were to be wed and Phil was extremely distressed about it.

  
He shouldn’t be and he physically hit himself for even feeling that.

  
He spent most of his time with Dan and King Francis referred to Dan as the ‘brother the Philip never had,’ and that thought made Phil incredibly sick.

  
He was going to wed Alice anyways, Phil gave up at one point. That thought made him ill and the way Alice stared at Dan made him even more ill and he couldn’t take it.

  
He surrounded himself in flowers and stars and he laid across the grass, just lost in the scent of roses and the sight of constellations.  
Phil tried to make out a silver lining amongst everything bad. His dog died? At least he can plant flowers atop his grave, make it prettier than his garden. His dad was yelling at him for not being able to fence properly? He can talk himself out of a problem anyways.   
Daniel James Howell, the guy he fancied, was to marry Alice Wilson Lester, his sister? Well at least he can subtly flirt with Dan with no consequences.

  
Or maybe there were consequences, he really didn’t think this through.

  
He wasn’t sure why he wasn’t freaked out by how much he liked Dan, he knew it wasn’t normal, apparently. He’s seen his father burning men because they were homosexual. Sinners. Disgusting. Dirty. An abomination.

  
But it felt so natural, Phil wasn’t that worried because he was’t going to act upon it ever. Dan didn’t need to know.

  
Maybe it was because he subconsciously knew before. He had never looked at a woman with lust but he fantasised about their husbands.

  
But it was all in his head, no one could kill for dirty thoughts.

  
He presented Dan with a white tulips once.

  
It stood for ‘one sided love.’

  
Dan didn’t need to know.

  
He gave him a coral rose and a bunch of coriander flower.

  
They stood for ‘desire, passion and lust.’

  
Phil winked at him and Dan was so very confused.

  
A few days after, it was cold so Phil gave Dan a yellow chrysanthemum.

  
‘Precious one,’ was it’s symbolism and Dan raised an eyebrow. Phil forgot he taught Dan what that meant.

  
He gave Dan a Gardenia that afternoon too and that meant ‘secret love.’

  
That confused Phil too because did he love Dan?

  
He shook it off because he shouldn’t fall in love with a man. There was difference between admiring from afar and love.

  
But every day, Dan was consuming his every thought, every dream. It was obvious too, he talked about Dan a lot.

  
“Goodness, Philip, why don’t you marry him instead of me?” Alice laughed and he blushed because he would very much like to do that.  
He gave Dan a Malva because he was ‘consumed by love.’

  
Not really, he was consumed by an extreme amount of fondness for the younger boy, oh dear, he couldn’t suppress it.

  
Maybe Dan thought he was to return the favour and he gave Phil a bellflower a few days later and Phil giggled.

  
Dan didn’t put in much thought, he guessed, a bell flower stood for ‘unwavering love,’ and why would Dan love him back?

  
Phil found that funny, or maybe he was laughing to cover up the sadness running though his roots.

  
He was sure Dan picked up the nearest flower, the meaning- no, the flower was too meaningful to give to Phil.

  
Maybe Phil was overthinking this so he shrugged it off.

  
Dan gave him an Acanthus once and Phil was sure he didn’t know what that meant.

  
Dan didn’t even know what an Acanthus is, he was sure. It meant ‘art,’ and that confused Phil.

  
Was he calling Phil a piece of art? Was he saying Phil was just as beautiful as his poems? As pretty as the paintings hanging in an order by the halls?

  
Dan didn’t know what an Acanthus was, Phil never told him, he was overthinking everything and it was stressing him out.

  
Phil entered Dan’s room at one point, it was raining outside and he wanted to be in Dan’s presence.

  
He noticed all the flowers he gave him were placed in small vases around the room. It brightened everything and Phil was happy Dan didn’t throw the flowers away.

  
“Phil.” Dan breathed when he saw Phil twirling the bellflower between his fingers.

  
“I’m bored. I was planning on planting some daffodils but the weather says otherwise.” Phil sighed and Dan laughed. Phil’s eyes widened and he grabbed Dan’s shoulders.

  
“Let’s explore the castle!” Phil yelled and placed the flower down.

  
“I thought you were familiar with every nook and cranny.”

  
“I am but you’re not. I see you getting lost everyday.”

“And you don’t help me?”

  
“It’s amusing! You look like a lost puppy.” Phil laughed and he grabbed Dan’s hands and pulled him out.

  
They ran, they didn’t know why but they ran.

  
It was kinda fun that way, they just ran through the halls and Dan’s heart nearly stopped when Phil took a sharp turn but it didn’t matter because it was fun.

  
They were out of breath, their hearts were aching but they were laughing. Phil shoved Dan’s chest.

  
“Tag!” He yelled.

  
“Pardon?”

  
“You’re to chase me now, haven’t you ever played tag?” Phil asked and Dan shook his head, “What is your childhood?!”

  
“I never had friends, Phil.”

  
Phil’s face dropped but he took Dan’s hands in his own, watching the rose blush bloom on Dan’s cheeks.

  
“You have me now! it’s a simple game, I tag you and you chase me until you tag me. It’s a repetitive cycle.”

  
Dan tagged Phil by poking him on the chest and muttering a “Tag.”

  
“Now you are to run.”

  
Dan ran, at first he was kidding around but Phil was serious and he was catching up and Dan was determined.

  
He ran past doors and maids. he took sharp turns to throw Phil off but Phil knew this place inside and out.

  
Dan climbed upstairs and he slid downstairs.

  
He slid past the ballroom and he scurried past the kitchen.

  
He ended up outside, in the pouring rain.

  
He ran through slippery grass and he stumbled through Phil’s garden. They always came back to Phil’s garden. He tripped over some mud and after a while Phil stopped by his fallen side.

  
He graciously fell on top of Dan, laughing his head off.

  
“I’m dying.” Dan said.

  
“Me too.” Phil said through ragged breaths and that made Dan feel some kind of way.

  
He turned over so his back was to the ground, Phil was still lying on top of him and his head was positioned between the crook of Dan’s neck.

  
Phil was flirting, he was sure.

  
Because Phil gave him this look, this specific look that made him melt. His eyes were narrowed and rain dripped down from his cheeks to his chin and he even licked some water off of his top lip and Dan should not be feeling this way.

  
He erupted into giggles and got up.

  
“You’re all dirty.” Phil said and Dan couldn’t agree more, “Come on, you need a bath.”

  
Dan’s hair was curly most of the time now, Phil took advantage of that.

  
He played with his curls from time to time, Dan would make an annoyed noise and Phil would giggle and ruffle his hair.  
The roles switched now, Phil stuck flowers in dan’s hair, he looked absolutely adorable with Jasmines sticking out of his curled tufts.  
Phil was beginning to like Dan a little more and more. The line between like and love was beginning to blur.

  
It distressed him, how they could never truly be together, how Dan could never return his feelings.

  
He needed closure at one point, he wanted to tell Dan. He didn’t want Dan to know but at the same time, he wanted Dan to know a little bit.

  
He sent his message through flowers.

  
He gave Dan a bundle of Amaryllis, white tulips and lemon grass.

  
Dan understood the Amaryllis meant pride.

  
He knew white tulips meant ‘one sided love,’ but lemon grass?

  
Dan didn’t find out and Phil wouldn’t tell him at all.

  
Phil planned to keep it that way.


	7. DIANTHUS

Sometimes when Dan couldn’t sleep, he would sneak into Phil’s room and they would fall asleep together. Half the time they would sleep outside while they stared at the stars.

  
Dan tried not to touch Phil at all, he was plain terrified. Not of Phil but of the consequences.

  
It was a warm Thursday and Phil was hanging upside down on his apple tree and Dan sat by the bottom, munching on a fresh apple and writing a stray poem.

  
“May I hear it?” Phil asked.

  
“I haven’t finished.”

  
“Neither is the story of my life but it’s a nice tale so far."

  
Dan sighed and laughed lightly.

  
“Rose blood roots  
Orange lily emotions  
Yellow copper loot- you see, I’m carrying a theme.” Dan said.

  
“When aren’t you?” Phil asked.

  
“Oh hush, it’s poetic.”

  
“Yes but it’s quite restricting isn’t it? Why name everyone of Esterbury after a constellation when you can call them a constellation and a galaxy? Why call everyone of Avalon a shade of grey when you can add in other colours?”

  
“That’s the point of a theme, Phil. It’s ordered, organised. It’s pretty.”

  
“Yes but you should be able to write about blue as well as red. You don’t have to write about blue all the time, you’re allowed more colours. Why not try yellow? Or Green? Or even-“

  
“Phil, I like blue.”

  
“You like black.”

  
“I like blue now, I should be able to like more colours other than black.” Dan’s lips quirked up and Phil sighed.

  
“All your themes are so sad, that’s what i was saying.”

  
“How so?”

  
“You only talk about stormy nights at the beach and all things cold.” Phil sighed.

  
“I write about you sometimes. You’re not stormy nor cold.”

  
“You write about me? What do you write?”

  
“I shall tell you when you tell me what lemongrass means.”

  
Phil’s face grew red and he stifled a cough.

  
“I shan’t.”

  
“I shan’t either.” Dan said with a determined tone and Phil flicked the back of his head.

  
They sat in silence, Dan scribbling away and Phil humming to a muddled tune.

  
“Danny boy,” Phil sang out and Dan looked up at him.

  
“Ugh, why are we friends?”

  
Friends. That word hurt both of them.

  
Phil laughed lightly, “I want to show you something.”

  
Dan looked up at him curiously.

  
“Alright.”

  
Phil jumped down and stared at Dan, waiting for him to get up.

  
“What, now?”

  
“Yes now! Come on.”

  
“I’m not that bothered, oh Phil, let me laze by the apple tree.” Dan sighed.

  
“I shan’t, come on, Dan.”

  
He pulled Dan up and they walked. Dan complained about how his legs ached. Phil wanted to shut him up with a kiss.

  
He was so very sick.

  
They were in the forest now and Dan was confused.

  
“Is this another one of your gardens?” Dan asked.

  
“No, no, something better.”

  
They trudged through the forest and Phil brushed away leaves and branches that fell in their way.

  
He uncovered a beautiful sight and Dan was mesmerised.

  
It was a small waterfall, the water was clear and it was just so pretty and Dan needed a day to describe this sight properly.

  
The clear water pooled into a small lake that was surrounded in the greenest trees Dan has ever seen. As a poet, he was lost for words.

  
“Oh my-“

  
“Come on then!” Phil said, grasping the ends of his shirt and swiftly pulling it off. Dan gulped twice.

  
Dan would rather spend all day staring at the curves and dips of Phil’s body than the waterfall.

  
Phil was so incredibly pale but so incredibly beautiful and Dan had to bite his bottom lip because he couldn’t stop staring at how his broad chest thinned to his waist and widened to his hips.

  
He couldn’t stop staring at his broad shoulders and the freckles dancing on his collarbones and God, this was torture.  
Phil tilted his head.

  
“What’s there to ogle?”

  
Dan shook his head because he wasn’t ogling at all.

  
Phil shimmied out of his black pants until he was just in his undergarments. He dipped in the lake and Dan’s eyes followed his legs because oh my gosh, Phil’s legs were a fine creation.

  
He copied, taking off his shirt and feeling Phil’s blue stare. Then he took off his pants and he blushed bright red. He looked at Phil and he looked away, playing with the water but Dan could see the Dianthus blush.

  
He jumped in the pool, splashing Phil on his way.

  
Phil threw his head back and laughed.

“You could’ve told me we were coming here.” Dan said.

  
“You don’t know where ‘here’ is.”

  
“You could’ve told me.”

  
“Why would I tell you when I could show you?” Phil smiled, his tongue poking out and Dan wanted it between his lips. He shook that thought away, going pink, like a sun rose.

  
Phil tagged him and Dan waded towards him, trying to tag him back. Phil choked on giggles and ducked away when Dan was close.  
“I can do somersaults underwater.” Phil said.

  
“Huh, so can I.”

  
“I can do more.” Phil said, crossing his arms in front of him.

  
“Well, bloody good for you, let’s put that to a test, shall we?”

  
Dan counted as Phil somersaulted 7 times before giving up. Dan laughed and beat him by three more.

  
“You’re a weakling.”

  
“Watch your mouth.” Phil snapped.

  
“I’d rather watch yours.” Dan said with a wink and Phil nearly drowned.

  
“You- ugh, are you attempting to flirt?”

  
“Yes, I reckon I’m great.”

Phil playfully rolled his eyes, “i’m better.”

  
“Since when was everything a competition?”

  
“I don’t know. i feel competitive today.” Phil said, the water up to his nose as he waded towards Dan. His eyes peered up at Dan and at that point, his eyes matched the blue of the lake.

  
“There’s another thing I want to show you.” Phil said and he grabbed Dan’s hand. He took him towards the waterfall and he went straight through. He pulled Dan in after despite Dan’s screams of protest.

  
“Oh hush! You aren’t going to drown.” Phil said and Dan coughed when he appeared out the other end.

  
They were now inside the waterfall. The wall of rocks behind them was like a crater, meaning they had room to move around but they didn’t.

  
Dan stared at how the water fell infinitely. He watched how the sunlight reflected orange and yellows off the clear water.  
Phil stared at Dan with just as much awe.

  
“Alice and I would visit this place on a daily basis.” Phil said. “We lost touch…or something like that, she isn’t the same anymore.”  
“So you bring the next best thing?” Dan laughed.

  
“Are you referring to me as a brother?” Phil asked and his heart was thumping to the point where it drowned out the sound of water splashing.

  
He wanted to tell Dan, he wanted to tell Dan so bad but he was so scared of the consequences.

  
He was going to marry Alice anyways, it wouldn’t really matter.

  
Dan wasn’t going to see him anyways.

  
“No, you’re not like a brother at all.” Dan said and he was staring right into Phil’s eyes and Phil was paralysed.

  
They were subconsciously inching towards each other.

  
“Less of a brother, more like a- a, oh Phil, you can’t look at me like that.” Dan said, finally blinking.

  
“Like what?”

  
“With your eyes narrowed and eyebrows knotted together. With your lips pursed and half raised. With your hair astray and ruffled.”

  
“What’s the harm of this ‘look?’”

  
“It makes me feel a certain way.” Dan said and his voice was lowered to a whisper. His normal voice felt too loud for such an intimate moment.

  
“Is that a good or bad?”

  
“Both and neither at the same time.” Dan breathed. He could smell the roses and honeysuckle on Phil. He could feel Phil’s warmth, despite them being in water that was quite cold.

  
“You make me want to- want to sin.”

  
And that was it.

  
Phil’s lips were on his, his pale body was pressed up against Dan’s and his fingers were tangled through his brown, damp curls.  
It wasn’t nice.

  
It was fucking amazing and Dan could see why people wrote such detailed ballads about kisses.

  
Phil’s lips were so fucking soft, like buttercup petals and his fingers trailed from his nape to his back, holding him in place because he knew Dan was just as dizzy as him.

  
Dan’s breathing was choppy and short but he didn’t care because Phil’s lips were- he- the way he moves- Dan was speechless.  
The kiss was like all the colours Dan never had the courage to write about. It was like doing something sinful- hell, this is sinful but it just felt so good, so exhilarating. Their lips were the clouds, flitting to collide gently with each other as a cloud would flit to another. The kiss was everything Alice couldn’t give him.

  
Phil was everything Alice couldn’t give him but Dan tried not to think about that.

  
Phil broke off the kiss first and Dan leaned in again, already missing the warmth.

  
“I apologise, I- I shouldn’t have, I’m sorry.” Phil stuttered, he shouldn’t have. Dan was to wed Alice, he couldn’t- he had no right.

  
“Regret? I’m confused.” Dan’s eyes widened.

  
“No! No, I don’t regret it, hell, I would kiss you again and again and again but I had no right. You’re engaged. You’re my sister’s fiancé, I- we’re two men- I-“

  
Dan leaned up and kissed him again.

  
“Hush, it doesn’t matter, Phil, at least not now, just- just forget with me.”

  
They met in the middle with just as much passion and lust.

  
Dan’s legs turned to jelly, he was ready to melt and leaned up on Phil, for support. He ended up with his legs wrapped around Phil as Phil pushed him up against the the rough wall behind him.

  
It was like bliss and euphoria met in the middle.

  
Phil moved lower and he was tracing his tongue along Dan’s jawline. Dan threw his head back and Phil nipped a little under his jaw.  
He stopped, that was enough for today. Dan was fully leaning on him for support, his arms around Phil’s shoulders loosely and his head buried in the crook of Phil’s neck.

  
They didn’t kiss, they melted into that one embrace and Phil could feel Dan shaking but he didn’t blame him, he was shaking too.  
“We’re going to die, Phil, we’re going to Hell.” Dan said and he was shaking even more. He clawed at Phil’s back because he was scared.

  
“Hush, Dan, it’s ok, ssh, we’ll be fine just- just keep it between us and we’ll be fine.” Dan looked at Phil and Phil brushed away some hair away from his eyes.

  
“We’re headed towards Hell, we can’t keep this from God.” Dan said, struggling to breathe.

  
“Well, I hope he has a special place in Hell for us.”

  
Dan couldn’t help but crack a smile at that. Phil press a chaste kiss on Dan’s forehead.

  
“I won’t let anything happen to you, alright? May we last until the last petal of my garden falls on the ashen grounds.” Phil promised and Dan’s smile grew.

  
“What does lemon grass mean?” Dan asked and Phil fiddled with Dan’s long fingers.

  
“Homosexual love, of course.”

  
“Hang on, have you been flirting with me through flowers the whole entire time?” Dan asked.

  
“Uh, yes.”

  
“I knew it. You really aren’t that subtle of a flirter.”

  
“You understand my point, Dan, I like you a lot.” Phil said and his cheeks were as red as a Geranium.

  
“I like you as much, Phil, possibly more.”

  
“Don’t kid yourself.”

  
Dan laughed and he kissed Phil’s cheek one more time.

  
“You’re the spot of blue on a monochrome photo of the universe.”

  
“Is that part of a poem you wrote of me?”

  
Dan kissed his lips once more with a soft hum.


	8. ACACIA

They were good at keeping secrets, well, they’ve managed to keep this one.

  
It wasn’t that hard at all, they spent most of their time with each other anyways. instead of simply intertwining flowers into each other’s hair, they shared frangipani kisses very now and then.

  
They were either running around the castle or splashing about in the small waterfall. Dan never really got bored of staring at the clouds with Phil.

  
“It looks like that- that ferocious animal from- um- Africa, the name seems to have blanked on me.” Phil clicked his fingers, trying to recall the name.

  
“A lion?” Dan asked and Phil clapped.

  
“Yes! A lion, rawr!” Phil growled and Dan laughed because Phil was so damn cute.

  
“You’re so adorable, stop before I explode.”

  
“I’m not adorable, you fiend, I’m dangerous! I’m wild, I’m ferocious!” Phil got up on knees and faced Dan, roaring and growling. He leaned up on Dan, arms pressed up against his chest for support.

  
“Yes, so very ferocious.” Dan said in a monotonous voice.

  
“Don’t mock me, I shall tear you apart!”

  
“Do you think a lone lion would stand a chance against a grizzly bear?” Dan asked, standing up. Phil got up and he made the meanest of faces.

  
“Ha! A bear? I have a mane, I have claws-“ Phil grabbed the front of Dan’s shirt and pulled him in. His voice dropped to a whisper and dropped a few octaves too. “I have teeth-“ He growled and now he had Dan’s bottom lip between his teeth. He pulled it back and released, watching it bounce back into place.

  
Phil had Dan pinned up against the apple tree as he kissed him, their lips being sucked and nipped by each other. Dan moved below to Phil’s neck biting and licking.

  
He left a mark or two and by the third Phil pushed him off.

  
“We mustn’t, we’re out in the open, someone might see us.” Phil reasoned.

  
“Well fuck them, o- or fuck me if you prefer-“

  
“Dan! No, we mustn’t let pleasure drive our minds. They’ll kill us, that’s for sure. At least- we can sin when we’re somewhere more private.”

  
“Alright, ugh, fine.”

  
Alice had Dan to herself the next day. She kissed him again but it wasn’t like the first kiss at all. He seemed more reluctant, he looked like he had to kiss her.

  
His eyes stayed open by the first kiss and he squeezed his eyes shut the second. Alice was getting slightly worried.

  
“What’s the matter? Was it not a good kiss? Am I doing something wrong?” She asked.

  
“No, sorry, I’m just tired, I’m sorry.” He said and he kissed her cheek, to reassure her.

  
“Oh, well, our wedding is soon.”

  
He was trying to forget, Alice wasn’t helping at all.

  
“A few months back, I would be bitter about it.”

  
Dan’s heart was thumping- not the kind of beats he feels when Phil is around but they kind he feels when his world slowly crashes before his eyes.

  
“But now, I’m glad it’s you I’m spending forever with.”

  
Dan was growing ill by the second.

  
“Daniel? What’s wrong?”

  
Dan stumbled as he tried to run. It was a slow run, almost a walk. He was cold, his stomach roared with nerves.

  
“I’m sorry, Alice- I- I’m not feeling too well-“

  
Queen Cecilia and Phil heard and they rushed in the room, wondering why it was so loud. Dan made his way to the door, to Phil. He needed to be held, he needed to cry, he needed to disappear.

  
He fell into Phil’s arms, holding in his weeps.

  
“I’ll help Dan to- uhm, Daniel to his room.” Phil said and helped him down the halls. Dan sat by the bed and Phil closed the door.

  
“Dan, what’s wrong? Please tell me.” Phil rushed to Dan, falling on his knees on the floor. he grabbed dan’s hands and stared at him with sad eyes.

  
“I’m to wed Alice, it- I can’t.”

  
The two had tried to forget that, to overlook it. Dan procrastinated, he was preparing to wed Phil rather than Alice.

  
“Dan, Dan, you’re not breathing properly, Dan, count with me.”

  
They counted to fifteen before Dan lost it. His whole body broke down in hazardous sobs.

  
He was the forbidden side of the sea, the part where waves drowned mermaid and sea foam suffocated the air. He was the part of the sea that managed to roar louder than the storms, the part that managed to crash onto land.

  
Phil didn’t know how to tame him.

  
He climbed up on Dan’s lap and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into the warmest embrace Dan had ever experienced.  
If Phil couldn’t tame the raging sea, he’ll be the moon that seemed to control the tides.

  
Phil sang to Dan, his quiet voice carried a quiet melody as Dan cried into his shoulder.

  
“I can’t- I can’t marry Alice. I don’t love her.” Dan said through hiccups.

  
“An arranged marriage doesn’t bloom from love, Dan.”

  
“I know but you- you make it unbearable.”

  
“Me?”

  
“I’m forced to spend eternity with someone else and I’m forced to look you in the eye after, I’m forced to be with someone i don’t belong with. I’m forced to leave the one person I love.”

“Love.”

  
There was no question rise to Phil’s statement. Dan looked at him with bloodshot eyes and tear stains.

  
“Love.” Dan confirmed and Phil kissed him through his raindrop tears and silent hurricane.

  
“This is torture for me.” Dan said.

  
“How do you think I feel? Knowing that the only man I love would be taken away from me, by my sister of all people. That he will be forced to be with someone who isn’t me. That he will be forced to pretend he doesn’t love me as much as I love him.”

  
“I wish I was a servant.” Dan said and Phil let out a weak laugh.

  
“No you don’t.”

  
“I’d rather be a fucking rat than be in this position.” Dan yelled. Phil kissed him, calming him down instantly.

  
“We could elope.”

  
“You can’t elope with another man.” Dan sighed.

  
‘You can’t love another man either.”

  
“Who would marry us? Who would host our wedding? They would rather burn us.” Dan sighed, pressing his head against Phil’s shoulder, “It the world against us.”

  
“How about we run away instead? Without the betrothal, just- just run away with me.” Phil offered.

  
There were so many holes in that plan and Dan’s throat was clogged up.

  
“To where?”

  
“I- I don’t know, Carteloise? Grandiel?” Phil asked.

  
“They’re so far away? How would we get there? Walk? They would catch us, they would send up search parties. We wouldn’t be able to hire a carriage- it would be too suspicious. The next village is three days away. Where would we get money? Food? We would die by the first day though I would rather die than go through with this.”

  
Phil brushed stray hairs away from dan’s face.

  
“Don’t die, please don’t die.” Phil said and Dan spent the longest time just staring into Phil’s eyes.

  
“What am I to do?”

  
“Hang on. Hang on tight, it’ll get better.”

  
It never did.

  
“Do you promise?” Dan asked and Phil bit his lips together.

  
He couldn’t guarantee that.

  
“I promise.”

  
He couldn’t bear to see Dan upset so he lied.

  
Dan knew he was lying but he believed him for that second.

  
“Dan, if this heads for the worst, I will find you in another lifetime.”

  
Dan was crying again and so was Phil. Phil brought Dan’s hands to his lips and he kissed it five times.

  
“Phil, I- I love you.” Dan choked out.

  
“I love you too.”

  
Dan said it so many more times because he meant it with all his heart. Phil hugged him, arms wrapped around his existence and they stayed like that forever.

  
Dan wished it was forever.

  
“Please don’t cry, it breaks my heart.” Phil said and Dan shook his head.

  
Dan stayed in his room, curled up after Phil left to get something.

  
Phil returned with a rose and Dan didn’t need to speak garden language to know what it meant.


	9. YELLOW ROSE

By this point Dan was numb.

  
He looked at Alice with dead eyes and looked at Phil with almost every single emotion he possessed.

“I’m going to lose you.” Dan said, they were curled up in Phil’s bed. Phil pressed a kiss on his forehead.

  
“No, I’m here. I’m here for you, forever and always.”

  
Dan traced small circles on Phil’s neck, the part his shirt neglected to cover.

  
He hated Phil, honestly. With every moment they spend together Dan falls more and more in love with him. He couldn’t even describe it in a poem, his words were too flawed to describe someone as perfect as Phil.

  
His metaphors seemed so dull next to Phil. He couldn’t compare Phil to a diamond because honestly, diamonds really aren’t that pretty next to Phil.

  
He felt safe, the feeling of protection washed over him as Phil wrapped his arms around him. Phil pulled him in and Dan’s face was against Phil’s heart.

  
That how he fell asleep for the next twelve days, to the beat of Phil’s heart.

  
On the thirteenth day, however, he didn’t sleep at all.

  
It was night and once again, Dan couldn’t sleep. He walked outside, his pyjamas covered in a thin robe. He rubbed his eyes as he stepped forward. He stepped back, eyes scrunched forward, he seems to have stepped on something. He looked own to see bits of coriander flowers sprinkled on the floor.

  
“What’s a coriander flower?” Dan remembered himself asking Phil that,

  
“It means lust,” Phil answered quickly and Dan blushed.

  
“I asked what it was now what it means, you loiter-sack!”

  
“Oh! It’s a flower, you tallowcatch!”

  
“Gillie-wet-foot!”

  
“Bobolyne!”

  
“Abydocomist!”

  
They glared at each other before they burst out laughing.

  
Dan shook his head, a fond smile on his lips. He followed the coriander flower to Phil’s room. The door was barely open, only a crack was open. The coriander flower ran out and there was a simple, light pink rose against the door.

  
Dan picked it up and he opened the door, not expecting to be greeted with twenty candles and a nervous Phil.

  
“What’s this?” He asked, pointing to the candles. Phil got up and he stood in front of Dan. He closed the door and locked it.

  
“I express feelings through flowers.” Phil said finally, “But strangely no flower in my garden can describe what I feel for you.”   
Dan couldn’t breathe.

  
“A rose is simply too tame to describe the bursts of love I feel around you.” Phil continued.

  
“A Hibiscus fails to describe your beauty.”

  
“A light pink rose doesn’t show you how much I desire you, how much I lust over you.” Phil said and his eyes were narrowed now, filled with lust. Dan bit his bottom lip, stifling his small gasp.

  
“Flowers are failing me nowadays, no amount of forget me nots and carnations can carry my affection but I hope- I hope this night can.”

  
Dan could sense what was about to happen. He sucked in his breath and leaned up, kissing Phil softly.

  
It started with a simple kiss. it grew more heated, as heated as the candles surrounding them.

  
Phil pulled Dan in, towards the bed. Dan sat down and Phil straddled his lap, kissing down his neck. Dan breathed out a slow moan as Phil nipped at his collar bone, as he licked down his clavicle. Dan gasped when Phil sucked a mark on his pale neck that was now flushed a deep red. Phil pushed Dan down, he pushed his robe away and he pushed away his damp hair, watching dan’s eyes sparkle in pleasure.

  
Dan took off his shirt, a sign that he was ready. Phil blushed, staring in awe at Dan’s body.

  
Phil was upon him once again, he kissed Dan’s chest, then he kissed down his stomach. His lips were like blue belles and Dan gasped at every touch. Dan pushed Phil’s robe off him, noticing he was undressed under already.

  
“Phil,” He sighed his name as Phil circled his nipple with his tongue, carefully nipping at it every once in a while.

  
“I-I-“ Dan couldn’t say anything so Phil hushed him with a lingering kiss.

  
Dan was on top of him now, kissing down his neck and Phil moaned- Dan’s eyes snapped open because holy- Phil’s moans erupted from the back of his throat, it was so damn deep and Dan wanted to hear more.

  
So he licked down his chest, just to hear Phil’s groans. Dan bit his bottom lip, savouring the noise.   
Phil pushed him down because this night wasn’t about him, it was about Dan.

  
Dan’s pants were off but his undergarments stayed on. Phil was a bit of a tease, he played with the hem of his underwear, playing with the string.

  
He had Dan’s full attention, their eyes were locked as Phil licked down his pelvis until his tongue reached the beginning of his underwear. Dan was hard, he filled up his garments.

  
Dan nodded, giving him full permission when Phil raised an eyebrow. Phil pulled off Dan’s underwear and now Dan was fully naked.  
He was lying there, the candles illuminating Dan, making him look soft and…golden and Phil just took this moment to appreciate how fucking beautiful Dan was. He was a rose showered in dew drops. A moonflower glowing from the cold light. A frangipani blooming amongst the Spring.

  
Prince Daniel was fucking beautiful and Phil loved him so much.

  
He peppered every single part of Dan with kisses, ignoring his throbbing cock, the one part that was begging for attention the most.  
“Ph-Phil, please-“ Dan begged and Phil loved listening to his voice pleading.

  
Phil kissed Dan’s lips, drowning out his pleads. He bit Dan’s bottom lip, pulling it out so painfully slowly.

  
“Phil! Ple-please!” Dan couldn’t even talk, he felt so damn good. Phil drew out another mark on his chest and he got up, Dan was between his knees.

  
Phil inched down and he bit marks on the insides of Dan’s thighs, he licked them so they were less red. He gripped at Dan’s hard dick, smearing the pre cum over it. He pumped it, his fingers dipping every where. He fondled Dan’s balls and ran his finger over his slit several times, causing Dan to moan louder each time. He stared at Dan’s flushed state, watching Dan arch into his touch, watching Dan’s back create a bridge as he grinned into Phil. Phil stared curiously at Dan’s penis, wondering if he should use his mouth too.  
It was Dan’s night, he should and he did. He mouth was hotly on Dan’s member and Dan let out the loudest of moans.

  
Phil stared at Dan, wondering if he should finger Dan as well. He cupped his hand around Dan’s ass and now he was fully on top of Dan again. Dan stared at him, confused to why Phil didn’t finish.

  
Phil’s lips were wet and he kissed Dan again.

  
“I’m going to- to use my fingers now.” Phil said and he leaned over to the bed side table, fishing for something slippery. He had a tub of aloe vera and some lotions. He used the aloe vera, smearing it over his fingers.

  
He gently placed a finger around Dan’s rim, Dan squirmed at the cold feeling. Phil put a finger up, slowly at first and Dan was breathing heavily.

  
“How does that feel?”

  
“I-it’s strange.”

  
Phil added in another finger, pulling in and out, stretching his fingers as far as he could.Dan heaved up, gasping into the touch. Phil added in another finger and Dan yelled out a “For God’s sake, Phil, I need you inside me, please!”

  
Phil grinned and he positioned himself so his cream smeared cock was against the rim of Dan’s asshole.

  
He pushed in slowly, it was very slow as to test Dan. Phil asked him if he was ok by every thrust and Dan would squeeze his eyes shut and nod.

  
After the pain subsided, Dan was hit with pleasure. Phil’s thrusts fell into a rhythm as he pushed harder, faster, stronger.  
Phil hit his prostate every time and by the end Dan was screaming. Phil was sure Alice was awake now due to Dan’s screams of pleasure.Dan touched himself with every thrust, his fingers pumping and pulling as Phil jammed into his prostate.

  
Dan screamed Phil’s name as much as he moaned it.

  
“Ph-Phil, close!”

  
They united with a messy kiss and Dan exploded everywhere.

  
“Dan! I-“

  
Phil didn’t finish his sentence before he exploded inside Dan.

  
They laid next to each other, panting and heaving.

  
“I love you so very much.” Dan said and Phil kissed his neck.

  
They laid by each other, staring at each other. Dan tried to memorise every star in Phil’s eyes before he was sold off to Alice. Phil smiled at the soft dew drops in Dan’s eyes, smiling at how honey they looked.

  
“You’re beautiful, you know that?” Phil said, tracing his rose across his features and Dan closed his eyes with a smile.

  
“So are you.”

  
They fell asleep naked and midst an embrace.

  
*

  
Prince Daniel and Prince Philip’s story is about to fall downwards. It was the day of Dan and Alice’s wedding and Dan spent half of it crying.

  
He had the door locked, no one should be able to go in- except Phil of course.

  
Phil had no flower but Dan had a few.

  
Phil sat beside Dan who was dressed in formal clothes, the clothes he was going to marry Alice in.

  
“I- I have this.” Dan said, he handed Phil some forget me nots. “I wanted to get you something that said ‘You are my only love,’ or ‘I will never forget you’ but I only know of the flowers you taught me to interpret. I have some forget me nots, if I’m not mistaken, they mean ‘true love,’ and you shall be my one and only true love.” Dan said.

  
“They remind me of your eyes too.” Dan said.

  
“Then maybe you should keep half of the bunch. So you won’t forget me.”

  
“Forget you? Ha! I will never forget you, Philip, you remember that.” Phil never forgot. “Forget me nots, heh, don’t forget me Prince, even if I’m with another maiden or even if you’ve crossed the seas.”

  
“Forget you? Ha, I will never forget you, Daniel, you remember that.” Phil weakly quoted him and Dan cracked a small smile.

  
“I love you.”

  
It didn’t matter who said it, the other would say it back anyways.

  
Phil kissed him, for the longest time because he wanted to taste Dan on his lips forever, he wanted to feel Dan’s every touch forever, he wanted to engrave Dan’s everything in his mind and grave.

  
They didn’t say much else but they sat their, fingers intertwined and minds wild.

  
This wasn’t something they could avoid.

  
So Phil walked him out of the room to the grand hall.

  
Everyone congratulated him and suddenly it was time.

  
Phil was sat by the front of the church, clutching five napkins because he was guaranteed to cry. Dan stared at Phil the whole time, their eyes didn’t stray until he had to look at his bride walk down the aisle.

  
She was beautiful, that was on everyone’s mind but all Dan could think of right now was how sad and distressed Phil looked.  
She smiled at him happily, her eyes lighting up.

  
Dan smiled, only out of politeness.

  
The priest droned on but Dan’s eyes were still connected with Phil’s.

  
Dan shakily slipped Alice her ring, he nearly dropped it because he was trying his hardest not to cry. She slipped on his and his heart was beating harder than ever.

  
He was hers now.

  
Not Phil’s, _never Phil’s_.

  
They were announced husband and wife and she kissed him. He stood there paralysed and everyone cheered. He looked at Phil- he wasn’t there. His eyes darted everywhere but Phil was nowhere.

  
There was a party of course, everyone danced int he ballroom and Dan had to dance with Alice. He wished her dainty hands were Phil’s long and pretty hands. He wished Alice’s face was Phil’s bright and beautiful face, oh, he wished Alice was Phil instead.  
Dan excused himself and he went outside, to Phil’s garden.

  
Phil was sat cross legged in the middle. His face was buried in his hands and Dan ran to his side.  
“Phi- Phil!” Dan said and took Phil’s face in his hands. Tears were streaming down his face, his eyes were glassy from dew drops and he looked absolutely broken.

  
“It’s- I- Phil,” and Dan lost it and they were a puddle of tears and mushed bodies.

  
Phil gave him a Cypress, for mourning, for sorrow because that’s what Phil was feeling. He felt so very broken and bitter and everything negative. He was the embodiment of one of Dan’s depressing metaphors, the ones before Phil came into his life.  
The last flower Phil ever gave Dan was a yellow rose. He handed it to Dan that very night, his eyes and nose red from crying his heart out.

  
Dan clasped the yellow rose, his sobs were renewed.

  
_“What does it mean? A yellow rose?” Dan remembered himself when Phil was teaching him garden language._

  
_“The happier meanings are friendship and extreme emotion.” Phil answered happily, sticking the flower behind Dan’s ear._

  
_“The sadder meanings?”_

  
_“Extreme betrayal and- um, broken heart.” Phil said sadly._

  
_“Broken heart? Have you had any of those, Phil?”_

  
_“Nope! Hopefully I never will.”_

  
Dan stayed by the garden that night of his wedding, his clothes wet with tears and fingers stabbed with thorns.  
He looked at the flower, his sobs broken along with Phil’s yellow rose heart.


End file.
